Jules, this is your crossroads and no one can tell you which direction is the best one to take. Just weigh up the consequences of your choice in the balance, and do what's best for you.
If you choose fading, then "cautious & innocent" should be forefront in your mind when in most J.W.'s company.
As for any loaded questions from elders and others, simply say "thanks for asking, but I can't discuss things at this time."
If you ever act bolshy/confident with elders, they may view your demeanour as a challenge to their "authority" and a "disrespecting of glorious ones." Avoid doing so if you want to fade. Take small steps as you travel on this road.